There’s a reason why money is taboo: its often very, very, very personal.  This weekend as I was taking a walk down my in-law’s neighbor’s dirt road I saw this sign: Private, Dead End.  I didn’t actually trespass in case anyone was worried that I saw the sign, took a picture and kept walking.  What I was thinking about as I took this picture is that personal finance is private on one level or another.  At some point in time you are more than likely going to draw the line between what is acceptable to communicate to others, and what is not public knowledge.

Where do you draw the line?  I personal don’t speak of my income to various people I work with, but some family members know that information.  I have been timid to share the actual amount of debt we have or how much I pay in taxes on this blog and pretty much everywhere else I’m speaking about personal finances - again, a few family members know.  One thing I’ve been able to perceive about this - private or not - is that as a personal finance blogger I don’t feel comfortable dumping out everything I’m thinking or doing just to be open.  I would much rather present principles that are useful than numbers which may help you gauge where I’m at, but not communicate the concepts which matter.

My personal financial state isn’t where I’d like it to be - and I’m assuming that unless you’re a billionaire, you, too, are working on improving your financial state.  I’m reducing debt, preparing to understand more about investment opportunities and generally trying to be wise with my family’s finances.  I tend to be a very open person, in the past it has gotten me into a discussion with my wife about being too open, but when it comes to personal finance I’m not concerned about your numbers.  I don’t want to know them.  I do want to know what your operating principles are, though, so let me know where you draw the line with sharing personal finance information.

What if you lose everything that makes you financially wealthy? I am going to explore some of this in a video podcast soon, but I wanted to share a story I heard recently that just hit this point home. I know a person who had a tremendous job that promised above average income and a whole list of benefits - but that job came at a cost: it began to affect his relationships.

A time came when the financial pursuits and the relational pursuits had come to a very strong and intense decision making point. The person had to ask himself: what matters most? The way he put it was very powerful: if you lose something and it hurts, you’ve given it priority. The question that he had to ask himself was whether or not his priorities were right.

His story ended well because he was able to continue to earn a solid income, and maintain his relationships as well as strengthen them. This isn’t always the case, but you need to be prepared to let go of what doesn’t matter - and as much as this blog is about personal finance money should not be your number one priority.

I just overheard a Cadillac commercial. A commercial suggesting that a new car would be the perfect gift this Christmas. A car. There are some cases where I can imagine this would happen, but I just can’t fathom it as normal. What gives? What is the most expensive present you have given or received? Why would a new car be a good birthday or Christmasn present?

I have still yet to pick up my wife’s Christmas present for this year but there is no way I could go out and buy her a car, that would be like suicide for our marriage. Just play it out in your mind, “Honey, where did we get the money for this car? I like it, but we didn’t have money saved up for a car.”

“That’s fine, I have it on a 144 month payment plan. We’ll be paying this car off until its in the junk yard! Don’t you just love the leather seats?”

Stupid.